Life as a lesson

I was kinda thinking...

Well more like I have a theory. Well at least I think I do. I mean, when the bumper car fairground ride in my mind needs some kind of order in my thoughts I spit it all out in this here blog, journal thingy. The only thing is I'm not sure if it is actually working this time around. I just moved the cursor up above the paragraph I was writingto write this paragraph, because what I wrote - or what you are about to read - was quite simply just stuttering out on this page with plenty of finger taps on the backspace on the keyboard.

Well, this week England Rugby fly-half and national sporting hero, Jonny Wilkinson, announced his retirement from international duty. After winning a world cup, 4 Six-Nation championships and a record amount of points (including a World Cup record of 277 and 36 drop goals, maybe never to be beaten, not forgetting winning the World Cup with a drop goal on his 'wrong' right-foot) he has decided to call it a day with England. My heart sank in a way. As a sportsman myself, I admire him enormously. I know he has still got some more to give at this level, but as ever the perfectionist, his reasoning was that he would never be satisfied at what he could contribute. I think there is something more there, something underlying about the recent chaos of the English Rugby Association. Time will tell, it usually does.

It is Jonny's theory that got me thinking of mine. I just said he was known as a perfectionist, being almost obsessive in his search for it. Practice makes perfect is still his way in the final years of his career. But does perfection even exist?

I really don't think so. But I like Jonny believe it does not mean we should never continue to strive for it. I think how we should approach this search is not to become so perfect, but to practice being the best possible person we can in what we do. I think it enhances an idea of going in to an arena of life which merits thought and learning.

So then I think, just what have I learned in life? How have I learned? Yeah I've studied quite a few things, both academically and non. It's then that I realise how much has been by trial and error. Learning from mistakes along the way. Is that the only real way we truly learn?

I remember as a kid how I thought that my Mum and Dad knew everything and that they were always right. It makes me think how I could have actually believed that as a kid.

Sometimes I also think we human beings, when insight and learning prove inadequate, resort to love. It is our hope when all else fails. That's our nature, it's how our life is. Yet it can also cause us so much pain. Just one argument for life against perfection.

As life goes on, we are constantly subject to change. Physically, mentally, technologically. Needs and wants. Life's demands. And this is another root of pain. And maybe resisting change is a natural reaction? We change to better ourselves and everything, right? Even if we do it can be painful. We will benefit and be more empowered is the theory, and therefore something positive, right? What if we don't benefit? Look at politics for God's sake. It seems like at the moment there has been more damage than anything else in years of late, it's almost painful in itself. I have no answers here. I'm just testing the water. But I know there is a difference between pain and permanent damage.

Somehow in my head this all links up, but how I got there after reading about Jonny Wilkinson I am still trying to figure out, even as I read back on what I have written here. So I'll keep on moving and keep learning like life demands of us. Our graduation day will be the day we die. Oh, and there are so many books by sportsman out there that they call 'autobiographies', I cringe at many - but I don't Jonny Wilkinson's will be like that, I'm dying to read it, he has accomplished so much. Maybe he has something to teach. Is that a subtle enough hint for a Christmas present?